Friday, January 29, 2010

we should carry people in life, not material things


Sometimes I question a lot why certain things happen. I question if I'm doing enough to help those around me. Why do hardworking and loving people sometimes have to deal with more of life's b.s. than anyone else? I do believe that things happen for a reason, but I often find myself not understanding that reasoning completely. I guess you have to look at it positively and say that things could always be worse and it will only make you a stronger person. Why does anyone deserve misfortune? I guess I just have to accept that I can't always find concrete reasoning's behind certain things to make my brain understand. But whatever goes around comes around. I know I sometimes need to step out of my paige bubble and realize that the petty, stupid things including: worries, annoyances, and everything in between that my tongue rambles on about most of the time, is pretty unnecessary and stupid. Plain and simple. It's just talk and thought to keep my mind flowing and my days going but sometimes something will occur in life to make you take a step back and realize once again, what you have. Or maybe I should say, who you have. I appreciate that it always has a special way of coming face to face with me and my ongoing thoughts, just to remind me to understand to look at the big picture in life and that first, it's not all about me, and and second, there are certain things that just aren't worth making a big deal over. Like school and the future. What will happen is gonna happen. If certain things are meant to be, then I can only hope they will be. But it's not necessary to stress, try to predict the future, worry, etc. because that won't help any and it just wastes time, energy, happiness sometimes, and makes things harder for myself. I just gotta do what I gotta do with school work and such and make it happen. There's no extra effort needed to complain. That won't help any. I constantly find myself at battle with my thoughts. Thoughts that I know are little and stupid and won't matter in 5 years, but I pick away at little things just 'cause. There is no reason, and I feel like it may be the cause of my stress and thus, my recent roll of having stressful and unhappy dreams. I want to think simple thoughts and not have so much complaining and whining clutter in my brain and come out my mouth. There is no need and if it is to be, it's up to me. I just have to stop fast-forwarding things in my head when no one knows what's going to happen in the future. The only thing certain is that we have today. We have now. I am going to always try my best to remind myself of that. Regardless if I encounter other people with bad attitudes, I will go on my la la la merry way and strive to be the best person I can be. I want to be happy with what I have at the end of the day, not what I dont have.
And when things don't always go your way, well, that's life, and nothing is always perfect. You pick up the pieces, you pick up yourself, and you move on.

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